Forever With You (Misfit Tattoo Book 1) Page 13

  “I’d go anywhere with you, babe,” Toby said.

  “Aw, look.” Harlow pointed across the street toward an elderly couple. The old man was helping his wife down some building steps. “They’re as cute together as Fanny and Dusty. Don’t you think? That’s the type of love I hope to find some day—everlasting.”

  Toby looked confused. “Who?”

  “Who what?” It was Harlow’s turn now.

  “You said Fanny and Dusty. I don’t know anybody named Dusty, and last time I checked, Mamma Deuce was a happily married woman.” Toby’s eyebrow arched.

  “Well, she is.” Harlow blushed. “I just forgot his name. Last time I went to Fanny’s with the girls, she joined us for a bit. When she sat down for her break, she told us, and I quote: ‘Damn, I love that man, but we’re getting old and our hearing’s not what it used to be. Not to mention everything sags, and swear to God his farts turn to dust.’ I just figured I’d call her husband Dusty until we were formally introduced.”

  Toby guffawed, and she loved it. It was a full, hearty laugh from deep in his belly, and her chest felt like it swelled with pride for helping him with that. He needed to smile and laugh more.

  “Holy shit!” Toby wiped his eyes. “His name’s Harold, babe. Fanny’s husband is Harold. I don’t think I’ve laughed that hard in years.”

  Harlow stopped and pulled him to a halt with her. She reached up and cupped the sides of his face. “Happy is a good look for you. You deserve this and so much more. I hope you realize that because I sometimes wonder.”

  “Yes, thanks to you,” Toby said. He wrapped his arms around her until she was flush against him for a kiss. The wind picked up, and she shivered, but it wasn’t until the downpour of rain fell on top of them that they broke apart breathlessly. Harlow laughed, and Toby smiled as she stepped back tipped her head up and twirled around the wet sidewalk.

  “This moment feels magical. Don’t you think?” she asked. “I feel so elated. Typical autumn weather be damned.” Harlow picked that moment to jump into a puddle and dance in the rain.

  Toby chuckled. “Come here, crazy woman, before you get yourself sick.” Toby held out his hand and pulled her close again as soon as she reached for him. He pressed his forehead to hers and just breathed her in. She loved it. Her hair was plastered to her face, and fat drops of water dripped off his. “As much as I love to see you so happy and carefree like this, I think it’s time to get out of the cold. I’ll take you home, then you can let me love you properly.”

  “An offer I’d never refuse,” Harlow replied. She gripped his hand tighter and led the way as they ran the few last remaining blocks to her apartment complex.

  ***

  Toby

  The minute they walked in, Toby slammed the door closed with his foot and pressed her against the wall to devour her mouth. He needed her, couldn’t ever get enough, and at times, it drove him crazy. To want someone this much was just insane, but there, he was feeling it. They tore at each other’s clothes. It took a bit of effort seeing as they were soaked from the rain. Instead of running like a normal person would when the downpour started, Harlow had embraced it. She’d danced in the rain for him like he used to as a kid, and fuck was it ever nice to be carefree for once. She did that to him. Made him want to be a better man. To enjoy life again. She was a lifeline for him after feeling like he’d been drowning for so long. It was like he could finally breathe again. Damn it, and now he was thinking nonsense. He grunted when he finally got her shirt off and dropped to his knees so he could work on her jeans. “I’ve got to take you here, hard and fast, then we’ll go slow, I promise.” He looked up past her heaving chest to see her nodding eagerly, as if she felt the same way, and he smirked. He yanked her underwear at the same time he shimmied her pants down her legs and cursed when her clothes got caught on her shoes.

  Christ!

  When she was finally free, he stood up and threw each article behind him. Toby took just enough time to unzip, pull his dick out, and enter her in one smooth stroke to the hilt. He just didn’t have the patience for his own clothes right then. The pull was too strong. Harlow’s legs wrapped around his waist as he furiously thrust into her over and over. He could swear nothing ever felt as good as this, as she did when they were joined. That thought alone normally scared the shit out of him. Harlow threw her head back and moaned. Her nails dug into his shoulders. It was a move she did often, and she ran them down his back as she held on for the ride. Her fingers trailed back up into his hair, gripping hard, and she directed him back to her mouth. The minute her soft lush mouth met his, she opened for him. Their tongues touched, caressed, and tasted. Her hips moved to meet his, matching his frenzied pace. He knew it wasn’t going to last much longer. Her pussy was so wet, warm, and smooth, tight, and it fit him like he was made to be there. “So close.” Toby trembled. “Come for me. Let me feel it before I let go.”

  “Kay.” Harlow nodded. She licked the index finger on her left hand and moved it between them to reach between her legs and play with her clit. She rubbed in circles slowly at first and then faster the more she got worked up.

  “Fucking sexy,” Toby growled and slammed in faster.

  Harlow cried out. “Yes, almost there, almost—holy shit, Toby! Toby!” The minute she gushed, hell, the second he felt her pulse, he erupted until he was weak in the knees. His forehead was pressed against the hallway wall as he tried to catch his breath, and Harlow rubbed his back to give him a minute.

  “You okay?” She gave him a quick kiss on the side of his head before he straightened to look at her.

  “Never better.” He smiled and squeezed her ass as he carried her to her bedroom while they were still joined. “It’s not every day I’m left breathless and in need of a minute before I can move again. He winked, and she giggled.

  “You say the nicest things,” she teased and laughed out loud as she bounced on the bed when he dropped her in the middle of it.

  “Do I?” Toby shook his head and finally got undressed. She amused him. He liked that they could be playful before, during, and after making love. It was refreshing.

  Harlow nodded. “Let’s take a nap before round two. I’m feeling a little tired.”

  “Anything for you, babe.” He leaned over to kiss her on the forehead and pulled the covers back before joining in. She was on her side, and he closed the distance to spoon with her. His front to her back, she grabbed his hand to hold and placed it near her heart. It was quiet, blissfully so. Minutes had passed, and just as he was about to fall asleep, Harlow being Harlow kept him on his toes and surprised him.

  “Toby?” she whispered. “Are you still awake?”

  “Hm,” he mumbled.

  “I love you.”

  Unbeknownst to Harlow, his eyes popped open. She wiggled a bit as if to get comfortable, and her breathing evened out before he could think to respond. Unlike the woman in his arms, sleep eluded him. Those three words were game changing, as much as he liked hearing them.

  There was no doubt Harlow was an amazing woman, and there were feelings; he felt them for her, knew without a doubt he wanted her in his life. There hadn’t been another woman since they got together. He didn’t want anyone else.

  But to have her love me?

  He knew if he gave into his heart, it would just make him feel guilty, and he had to figure out how to get past it.

  He owed it to them both so they could keep what they’d built together.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Dear Harlow:

  I’ve been good friends with this guy for about four years now. He’s my brother’s roommate, who we’ll call Jack, and lately, I’ve been feeling more than I should for him. Last weekend, we were drinking and hooked up for the first time. It was amazing, and I can’t stop thinking about it. I don’t know what to do. Should I lay it all out there and see if he feels the same? Or should I try to move on? We have the same group of friends, and I’m afraid to ruin what we already have. I don’t want to lose h
im, either way. Help!

  ~Confused and Crushing in Minneapolis~

  *

  Dear Confused and Crushing:

  Some of the best relationships start off with being friends first before starting something more. Talk to Jack. I’m sure it was just as amazing for him as it was for you. There is nothing wrong with giving in to your urges every now and again. Communication is key here, and I say, lay it all out there. You may have regrets later if you don’t.

  Worst case scenario, he doesn’t reciprocate your feelings, and you remain friends. Best case, your desires are met, he feels the same way, and you all live happily ever after.

  I’m rooting for you.

  All my best,

  Harlow

  ***

  Harlow

  The pitter patter of heavy rain drops against the bedroom window woke Harlow. She stretched with a smile on her face as she thought about the night before. The movie, playing in the rain, and Toby taking her hard against the wall. He’d woken her periodically through the night for some more sexy times too, and she felt well and truly loved. It was amazing.

  The soft cotton of Toby’s shirt caressed her body as her back arched in a stretch. She threw her arms above her head and moaned before she opened her eyes fully. The sight of her delectable tattooist sitting up beside her in bed was what greeted her. And what a sight to behold. He was half naked, nothing on but his jeans open at the fly. He looked completely relaxed with a coffee in one hand and a piece of paper he was reading in the other.

  “Hey, handsome. You been up long?”

  “About an hour.” He gripped the paper tighter and gave her a look she didn’t quite understand. “Figured I’d let you sleep a bit more, make some coffee, and I’d relax a little seeing as I took the day off to spend it with you. Funny how plans can change in a split second, though, huh?”

  “Excuse me? Forgive me for being a little confused here, but I just woke up. What’s wrong?” It wasn’t necessarily what he said, it was more about his body language. Something had changed in his demeanour from last night to this morning, and whatever it was, it wasn’t good. He looked hurt, maybe even a little pissed off at her.

  “Do you have anything you want to tell me?” Toby put his mug down on the ground and waited for her to respond.

  Harlow sat up. “I don’t know. Should I?”

  “What the fuck, Harlow. You knew!” He waved the paper around and shoved it in her face. “Here I was agonizing over telling you about my past with Carley, and you already fucking knew about it, with this. I trusted you. Do you have any idea how hard that was for me? To move on and be with you.”

  “I-I didn’t know at first.” She got on her knees to plead when he sprang up from his seat to pace in front of the bed. She reached out for him, but he brushed her off, and she could feel the moment her heart broke. It was beating so hard, it felt like it was about to be ripped right from her chest at any moment. Tears sprang to her eyes. “Please let me explain.”

  “Then talk,” he said. He sounded exasperated with her. “Who the fuck wrote this? Was it made public? You put it in your column?”

  “Where did you find that?” Harlow bit her lip to keep from sobbing. She’d never seen him this upset.

  “Really? That’s your first question. I can’t believe this shit.” Toby sat down abruptly on the side of the bed and put on his socks. “Word to the wise, Harlow. You try to keep something from someone, you don’t leave it out in the open. The letter was on the damn counter beside your other mail. Saw it while I was making my coffee.”

  She remembered then. She’d taken the letter out of her purse the other night, debating on whether she should just get rid of it. She’d meant to after her talk with Mel a little while ago but then forgot about it. When she was with Toby, they mostly went to his place. Rarely did they come to her apartment. Only they had last night because it was closer.

  Harlow nodded in acknowledgement. “I received the letter before we even met from someone who was worried about you. As a favor to them, I never made it public. I promise you, it never made it in Twin City. It was only after you told me what happened that I realized this letter was about you. Toby, I swear it. I know you’re upset but…”

  “Who?” He turned his head sideways to look at her again, and this time, her sob escaped. He looked so haunted, defeated, and betrayed. She couldn’t stand it.

  “I-I can’t tell you.” It came out as a whisper, and she winced. Her response sounded bad, even to her own ears. “I’m sorry, but I have an ethical responsibility to keep my source confidential.”

  “Well, fuck you and your ethics.” Toby jumped up again, buttoned up his pants, and pointed an accusing finger in her direction. He looked her up and down with a curl of his lip and snarled. “Keep my shirt. I don’t want it, or you, for that matter.”

  “You don’t mean that.” Harlow quickly followed as he charged out of her bedroom. “I can understand that you might need time to think about all of this, but I didn’t do anything wrong. I would never intentionally hurt you. I love you, Toby, and I haven’t loved anyone since before Lily died. You’re the first person I’ve been with since. The first person who understood what I really went through when I lost her. Take some time, but don’t shut me out. We’re good together.” She wiped the tears that were clouding her vision, and Toby looked anguished.

  “It’s too late,” he replied, wiping some moisture from his own eyes. “I warned you I didn’t think I had forever in me anymore. Why do you think I didn’t say I loved you back? I heard you last night, and I’m hearing you now. Forget about us. Better yet, forget about me. As you can see, I’m damaged goods.”

  “Don’t you dare say that.” Harlow was at her snapping point now. She had to get through to him before he walked out. As it stood, he was zipping up his jacket and putting on his shoes to leave. He’d be out the door in a minute. “You were right. It is too late because you’re amazing, Toby, whether you want to see it in yourself or not. I could never forget you or what we have. You’re the one throwing it away, so that’s on you. I just hope it’s not too late when you realize what a mistake you’ve made by walking out that door.”

  “At this point, it’s a chance I’ll have to take,” he said. He yanked open the door and looked over his shoulder. “You should have told me. Trust is not something I give lightly.”

  By the time Toby walked out, Harlow was shaking. She collapsed in a heap in the same hallway they’d made love in the night before. She was heartbroken, utterly devastated by his reaction, and she cursed him for his stubborn ways. She should have known better.

  Toby was obviously stuck in the past, not ready to move on, no matter how much patience she gave him or how much she’d tried to help him feel better. This morning had been an eye opener, and she was beginning to lose hope.

  How was she ever supposed to compete with a ghost?

  They had been doomed from the start.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Toby

  As soon as the door shut behind him, he banged his head against it. He could hear Harlow sobbing from inside, and it tore him apart. He just felt so violated, and his anger got the best of him. He needed to leave and cool down, but first, he was going to get to the bottom of this. That letter bugged him, and he was determined to find out who wrote it. It was clearly from someone who knew him well. That left only about a handful of people, and they all needed to mind their own fucking business. Let him live his own life. He finally had a good woman again, but she was better off without him. Wasn’t she?

  Shit!

  Toby yanked at his hair and walked away while he still could. His heart ached, but he’d brought that on himself. He should be used to it by now. After hailing a cab, he phoned Misfit, and Diamond answered. “Misfit Tattoo, Dee speaking. How may I help you?”

  “It’s me,” he said. “We need a meeting, and I’ll need everyone present for it. I’ll be at the shop in that hour we close for lunch. There are things that need to be sa
id, and I don’t want to repeat myself. We clear?”

  “Crystal. Everything all right?” Dee asked.

  Toby was quick to reply. “I’ll be there soon enough, and you’ll find out.”

  “Whoa,” she said. “Okay, then. I’ll let everyone know we’re having lunch in the break room today. Anything else, boss?”

  Toby sighed. “No, I’ll see you soon, Dee.”

  “Uh huh. Soon,” she replied before hanging up.

  As he disconnected, Toby rubbed a hand down his face and pocketed his phone. He looked out the cab’s window to the blurry sites of the city he loved, and he already knew it was going to be a long-ass day ahead.

  When he made it home, he went straight upstairs to take a shower and grab a beer before confronting his friends. There was some time to kill, and it was five o’clock somewhere in the world. Today, he needed it.

  When he woke up this morning, the plans he’d made with Harlow had held so much promise. He’d wanted to spend all of it with her, from sun up to sun down. Show her with actions what he had a hard time saying with words, about how much he cared. Only because of hurt feelings and pride, he’d ended their relationship instead. He kept telling himself it was easier this way. He was so fucked up. He didn’t deserve her, anyway. Toby’s hands fisted at his sides, and he took a few deep breaths to calm down. One beer turned into two before he headed into Misfit for the confrontation.

  When he got there, Carson was waiting in the lobby. They put a ‘BE BACK IN AN HOUR’ sign on the door and locked up. “Hey, man. Everyone’s waiting for us in the break room.”

  True to his word, when he walked in with Carson, everyone was sitting at the table, eating pizza. They all looked up when they saw him and quieted down.

  Rebel gave him a nod in acknowledgement, Dee waved, Carson grabbed himself a slice, and Mel was the first one to speak up. “What’s up, Tob? Are you okay?”